Every day we create narratives around events that happen to us. If they are bad, the tapes that run through are mind are usually, Oh my gosh, this is so tough; why does this have to be so complicated; or Ugh, Why do they have to be so annoying?
When we encounter problems, it’s easy to create doomsday stories to go along with them. These stories make up a large part of our experience. The only problem is that our stories create attitudes that, unless we’re careful, affect how we experience life. We need to be careful because our everyday commentaries are sure to color our actual experience. If we think something is going to go wrong, it tends to.
Simply by changing our stories, we
• Turn our challenges to opportunities. When we approach each problem with a sense of dread, we activate our “reptilian response,” and just react to the problems, instead of responding to them rationally. Close minded thoughts like, that’s impossible can change to maybe if I tweak it a little this way will make it work, opening up a whole other realm of possibilities.
• We might realize our perceptions are dead wrong, creating stories that are just wrong. We could mistake a look from someone as being mad, when perhaps they were just trying to repress a sneeze, or mad about something else entirely. We change our perceptions, by pleading ignorance. Realizing that not only do we not know what others are thinking, we certainly can’t control it if we did. We are not as affected by other people.
• We are more bearable to work with. Who wants to listen to Debbie Downer, or as my husband is fond of calling one of our relatives, a Negative Nelson?
“The mind is its own place, and in it self can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven.” ~John Milton, Paradise Lost
This message brought to you by the resilience attribute – REFRAMING!